There are many ingredients that we could identify as important for growth to occur. I’m referring specifically to personal growth and improved performance.
I’ll give you 3.
1) SUPPORT
We all NEED support when we’re trying to improve, no exceptions. And we need it in the right forms and in the right amounts.
Not everyone’s the same–we all need support differently. This is important for coaches and leaders to know as well. There is no “one-size-fits-all” format for the support we need/give.
As obvious as this is, I repeatedly see managers, coaches, and leaders facilitating everyone’s growth path and progress in generally the same manner (despite them saying that they “know” there’s no one-size-fits-all).
Growth is usually not easy. In fact, it’s often very difficult. The status quo of your existence can push hard against our efforts to change.
There’s something in all of us that pushes us to stay comfortable and take the easy path.
When we finally do make the decision to change, and take those first few steps, we’ll automatically increase our chances of success if we’re connected to sources of robust support: this can come in the form of encouragement, cheer leading, comfort, empathy, etc.
The bottom line is that it needs to feel SAFE to try new things and venture into new territory. Safety is vital–that we’re not PUNISHED for trying.
It needs to be “safe to fail”. This never happens without support.
2) CHALLENGE
We never grow without healthy challenge being present.
This can come in many different forms. Feedback and healthy confrontation are what quickly come to mind when someone thinks of challenge.
However, it also includes things like giving new information, “raising the bar” of expectations, and teaching.
And, as with support, there’s no “one size fits all”–we all have our own unique way of needing challenge when we’re trying to grow.
As you might imagine, challenge needs to be combined with support. Challenge works best if it’s in a strong context of support. This is the only way challenge can be heard, received, and digested.
Challenge AND support, working together.
3) TIME
Growth never happens overnight, even with the right amounts of support and challenge present.
And, we all have different capacities, skill levels, strengths, natural talents, foundational knowledge, and potential. Therefore, everyone has their own pace for growth.
If I had to learn calculus, it would take a long time. I didn’t get that far in my math studies, so I’m lacking some of the foundational knowledge for calculus. I also don’t have a natural talent for math, so that would make my growth trajectory longer than some.
Time is a necessary ingredient for all growth. You can’t get away from it. If you’re the one growing, be patient with yourself. Sure, challenge yourself, but be realistic.
And if you’re the one facilitating the growth–you leaders, managers, and coaches–be realistic as well.
In many martial arts they have the belt system, and everyone progresses exactly through the same stages of growth before they earn a Black Belt.
Some do it faster than others, for reasons we just stated–i.e., higher levels of natural talent. But there are no overnight black belts. Why? Because growth, progress, learning, and improvement ALWAYS takes time.
So then, here are 3 essentials for growth.
There may be others, but these are foundational. You can never get away from these 3.
Build these into any personal growth project you embark on, and you’ll be setting yourself up for strong success.
Who’s giving you support? Who’s encouraging you? Who’s listening to you with empathy?
Who’s challenging you? Who’s giving you feedback–both positive and negative–in an effective manner? Who’s challenging you with new information for your “growth area”? Who’s “getting in your face” (in love!)?
And finally, are you considering time?
Put them all together, and keep growing my friends!